This is a topic which I don't really know much about, cause i'm not really into the political views on all these but i've seen the news and heard about it here and there. The first thing that came to my mind was that..." 6.9M ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! " hahah! I'm sure when you guys heard about this figure, you guys reacted the same way as well.

Well, as for teenagers at our age, this wouldn't really seem like an issue, because we are rather enjoying ourselves. Or maybe it's just me. I really have no idea about anything in the political realms. But let's face it, it will affect us when we start to grow old, having a family of our own. Now when people ask me to write about this, I actually realized there's so much I need to know that is happening out here in the country, governmental etc. As of now, the issue that has been going around causing all kinds of talks, is the future of Singapore population. An big increase to a 6.9 million by the year 2030. That's like.. 17 years from now. I'll only be 37. Hmmm.... As of now, I already feel like i'm living in a sardine can. Some places are not so bad and not so congested. But come on, going to town seeing the crowed already makes me feel so irritated at times. The only way if the government is going to increase the population is if they can actually make plans to accommodate all these people. First of all, Singapore itself is already very small. I mean, as you can see now, almost everywhere it's buildings and buildings. If they're going to build more land, there won't be much greenery left in Singapore. Other than that, if you read around there has been an uproar about the PRs in Singapore. The plan is to add 30,000 more each year. If I'm right I think I saw somewhere that this doesn't have to happen, but it's because of the aging population in Singapore, a quarter of the population would be retired between now to 2030. They need more young people in the country who can take care of the elders. Hmm. I also saw some comments around that actually said stuff like they actually decided to leave Singapore, because they think that the other countries have better prices than Singapore and they can afford better there. Well, I do have to say in Singapore everything just keeps rising. If prices actually drop. That's a miracle. The standard of living here is relatively high. Job opportunities are also hard to get because of the spots are given to the foreigners due this " Foreign talent ". Well, if more people are going to come in then I suppose these are just going to get harder, people would have to fight even harder for employment and at that 6.9M is just the worst case scenario as it is said. If it doesn't go as plan, we can end up like HongKong, congested like mad. I just hope that would not happen. Anyways, also I've heard about the issue Singaporeans losing their identity as Singaporeans. I was reading this post about it and I came across this person's view and I actually think it's true.

So I was asked by a certain someone to write about childish people so that's gonna be the topic I shall write today! These are just my views and what I think!

I don't really know much of my friends who are childish actually, nor do I have anything against childish people. But sometimes what they do can really affect others in ways they think that it doesn't. Hmmm.... Usually I think this happens most of the times in secondary schools. Most of the stories I hear are from people much much younger and those who are childish at a older age, maybe just haven't changed their certain habits maybe. Well, the usual stories are surrounding the issues where they do stuff that make them seem like a bad kid and make them look cool and they go around saying that they did this and that even to people they are not close with, they just want people to know what they did. Some of these things they do are like, let's see... I've heard they ran away from home ( Obviously they went home after awhile. I don't see how is that running away from home but ya....) then maybe they smoke or they did smth, or went somewhere. I mean these are fine, like people who smoke, I don't really see them going around saying omg you know I smoke? LOL. Like seriously.. if you're just doing it to be part of the "cool group " of the world, you have a wrong view of it. I've also heard about people doing stupid stuff when they're in school uniform. Okay, i mean if it was me, I might have done stupid stuff also but then, as long it doesn't cause the community or the crowd any issue or make them look down on the school. I mean I represent something, the only thing they can notice about you is by the uniform. But they won't think about you as a person, but they will think of you as what you represent which is the school. They'd think that the school has kids like that who does stupid stuff. Another kind of childish behavior is, when they did something they know they did, and they totally deny everything that has to do with them. I mean come on, you started it just accept your mistake. It's better than hiding the truth, I mean like obviously if people already confront you, they already know the truth, and then you just deny it. That just makes you look bad and cowardly. Especially when it has something to do with friendship and relationships. You should just really say the truth and well, try to amend the issue. Even if you can't at least the friend knows you try to do smth, and maybe after sometime things would be back to normal again. But hiding everything when the person knows it, will make that person keep a wrong image of you for the rest of his life until you do smth about it.

I also feel that sometimes even in an relationship some people can be rather childish, *By my experience*. I just feel that if you're not even serious about being in a long term r/s then don't even go around looking for someone to fill that part of your heart for a moment of time then dump him/her. Even worse is still being in the r/s but yet not showing any kind of affection for the person, or well treating that person like he/she is just someone you usually text. Then when you are tgt with this person, you don't make this person people that he/she is the one you depend on. People who always choose to do other stuff that obviously isn't important at all compared to the plans you had before. What's the point of a relationship if you are going to be like that right? I find that kinda childish and selfless. There's just so many other ways they can be childish by character. But these are what I know for now. But well, it doesn't matter when the person can be childish at times, but yet also do the right things when times are appropriate. That i'm sure it can be put up with. But if the person is doing that everyday and every moment. I don't think the other party would want to continue the relationship or the person just wouldn't act the same with you anymore. It would be good if he/she points out where you are childish or doing things that isn't right, but if you do not make effort to change, that I believe is a big no-no especially when it's something that makes you into a better person. I believe we all have been childish at points of our life. But we must always know how to change or make up for what we have done. That's the only way you'll be able to learn and grow up step by step. Everything takes time to learn. If we do have people who we think are childish in a way, I think we also should help them by telling them nicely in the appropriate time, showing love and concern on how they should not do what they do, and teach them what's the right thing to do and how to do it so that they will know that you're just looking out for them. That's all I have for tonight! :D

If you have any thing you want me to talk or share my view about just drop me a tweet or write to me on my tagboard in the footsteps section at the right side. Thank you for taking your time to read this! Love you guys! Peace!

Here I am, once again with nothing to write. Didn't come here with a plan on what to write. Just felt like being here.

Just a simple update on what going on right now, i'm currently finishing school in ITE, exams are in the first week of march and honestly,  I feel so unprepared. Probably going to start studying later in the afternoon with my classmate. Hopefully I'll get things done. Life's good I can say? But I've been real busy with school work and stuff recently that I didn't much time for anyone or anything. I really do hope I can do well for my EOY. I still hope I can piece everything together and live life better.

As for Valentine's day last week, I really had a good time! Though I thought that I'd be spending it with that special someone, but I guess I cannot live a lie. But nonetheless, I met my best friend at NEX for lunch and for a study date ! ( Yes I know, we're geeks muhaha ) We ate @ MOF and we had so much to eat that I was really going to explode! Haha knowing me, I ate like a hamster. After which we went to walk walk, and we bought a pair of friendship band for each other! It's been so long since I've had one with anyone! Then we went to the library to do our work. There was this uncle opposite us, who sat there smiling at every girl when they walk past him, it's like he came there to look at girls instead of reading the newspaper! Worst off was that we sitting opposite him and he kept looking at my best friend. LOL. Then we saw him and then we talked about him and laughed, think he knows (?). But I can understand uh, my best friend is pretty maximum. After which, we took some pictures and she went to get her boyfriend some gifts and stuff! Like so fun to shop for gifts though it's not for me nor from me but still woo! Then she left to meet her boyfriend and Austin came to meet me at NEX!


Austin came around 530 plus, we walked to get ourselves some BUBBLE AWESOME TEA. Then at that time Haoyi also reached NEX so we all had alot of time on our hands, what did we do? We went to the top and sat outside the library like a hobo facing the rain. Was quite a nice atmosphere though. We talked about stuff I have no idea what of, and we played Icon Pop Quiz! We got hooked so it really took alot time off us while waiting for the girls to finish their doing their hair at the saloon in town and then meet them at punggol, and then head down to this place which I have no idea what's it called. LOL. It's a place where's there restaurants and then this pool area and some fishing/prawning area. We had Popeyes, but since I had a good lunch I was still too full to eat anything so I just grab some snackers and we were off to play pool! Had a good time with them, and then we snap pictures like we never had before on the train back home. Hehehe! :D In the end it was a day well spent! <3 p="">
P.S : Write on my tagboard if you want me to write about anything special ! Or Tweet me ! :D

2013 - The Year I Want To Dedicate To Relationships With People & Spiritual Growth.

Well, this year wasn't really a good start I would say, or should I say it started well, but didn't last long in the relationship I had with someone. That aside, all other areas of my life was growing better ~

Firstly, it's only been almost 3 weeks of the new year, and it felt so long already. Maybe I've lost track of time. I'm not rushing anything this year, slowly accepting what is or what is to come as it comes. Getting past each hurdles one at a time. Growth can't be done with a big leap over many hurdles, you'll either crash or you'll just get stunned after which. This year 2013, I feel much closer to God, and I've changed so much. I've started reading books, after 19 years of my life. I finally read finish a book. In the past month leading to 2013 and as of January I've finished 2 books, "Faith that overcomes the world" , "Winning Faith" and I am currently reading my 3rd book titled "Bondage Breaker". It's such a great book! It talks about how you overcome negative thinking, irrational feelings and habitual sins. I would recommend you guys to read it! :P Or ask me if you guys want to read it. It's a very old book though.... :P

Well this year, I've got more commitments to grow myself and I'm doing this with 2 of my leaders and another cell group member.
1. Attend Every Prayer Meeting On Friday
2. Come for PRE - "Pre-Service Prayer Meeting"
3. To the person that we individually chose to help grow stronger in the Lord.
4. Committed to fast once each week.

I just hope I can keep to them as much as I can! During our previous cell group, there was only the 4 of us. The parent's of my cell group said that they felt as if we had a cell group with alot of people and when they came out they saw only 4 of us. Which really encouraged us, because we ourselves could sense the spiritual atmosphere during our cell group meeting. It was very good. Words can't really explain, it's felt. Talked about how we must start the year wearing the armor of God. Which is very important.

As I was praying, I had a picture in my head, of a warrior of Christ, fighting the battle against the devil in the world. But, there also was another picture in my head, where I was in this big field of grass and a big tree with wind blowing across the place. And there I was, holding God's hand and walking to the field, and there was a swing. I ran to the swing and sat on it, first using my legs to push myself back to start swinging, and there after which was God who was pushing me. I had no worries, I just enjoyed the peace and joy. What I got from those 2 pictures as I was praying was that, as Christians we all are warriors for Christ, being the salt and the light for the world, but we ourselves must have time for God, do not be so concentrated on the war that you forget about God. Each warrior needs that motivation, that memory of joy and happiness that gives them something worth fighting for. We will lose the moment we don't see hope, and we lose that reason worth fighting for. We should always come back to God, even in the midst of battle, so that he can restore to you your strength and your motivation to continue fighting on. We need to always go back to our source of hope and that is God. So we always need to keep praying!

After Cell group, it was drizzling on my way home and it was quite heavy. As i was walking to my lift lobby, I saw a cat sitting there alone in the rain, getting drenched. And I thought to myself, if only this cat could understand me. And I walked by it and went to the lift, but I was promt to see the cat again. So i did and I wished it could come to shelter rather than just getting wet there, and it was just looking around at me and other stuff, and I said, turn right, which is towards me & it did at that very moment, then again I said walk to me and guess what, it did! Then, I pat it and said stay here ~ and it did, and then I went back to take the lift. The revelation I had then was, that with a willing heart to do good, command it and believe in it, and it shall be. You will be rewarded according to your faith.

From the book I read, the author explained, that your walk with God is a one way road. And the devil and his demons are like residing in the houses on the sidewalk. All they can do, is to attract you with things that the flesh would desire for, but they can never directly make you stop your walk with God, they only can make you into thinking that something is better than our walk on that road. They can only shout out from those windows but it's up to you, if you give in they can consume you. It's up to you to make the decision to ignore them and continue walking. Never allow yourself to give the devil a foothold in your life. Even if you do, confess it before God that you may be free and cleansed. Confessing isn't just plainly saying sorry, or saying I won't do it again. Confessing is admitting to your wrongdoing, and bringing to light your sin, as such " Dear God, I have given into ______ , and I am wrong, please forgive me". The more you force yourself to stop something by your own will, the more you are vulnerable to start it again. Bring it to God, and let it go. Don't condemn yourself for doing it. We're not perfect.

Well, I do hope to those who have read this it would have helped you and motivated you in some ways! :D Do continue to keep praying and keep having faith! :D You'll get through anything as long as you believe that you will! :D

Life has been really tough these few weeks. School exams, and just life. I don't know how i pulled through but i did. Oh gosh, i'm suddenly having headache as I start to write... But whatever, if i don't finish, I most probably won't write again for a long time. Everything just seemed meaningless in my life recently, I was just so tired of everything. I don't know what to do, where to go, who to talk to about my stuff and all. But mostly I couldn't talk about it cause it's something I have to go through myself. Been rather quiet I can say. Don't know if people noticed but some did. For my exams I gave it all I got, i studied so much, i felt really bad that I didn't go for cell group just cause I wanted to study. I felt really terrible. My leader said, that even my O lvl members came for every cgm and pm. Then I just felt extra crappiness. I felt I let her down, I let God down. I couldn't concentrate on my studies anymore. I was torn between doing well for my exams and cgm. The right answer would be putting God first, but also doing well so that you can glorify God right? But at the same time if I don't do anything about my studies then I don't know. I studied so so much and I still got a B. Im glad cause I expected it to be a B. Oh well, somehow I missed 2 CGM and 2 pm this year. Felt like crap. I stopped and think, everything I'm going through, why am going through this, and why is others who are not leading a spiritual life, having a better life than me as of now. I just couldn't understand it. I broke down, I cried. I felt I wasn't close to God, I felt far. But then today I found my answer. Everyone was asking me to go clubbing tonight, since r3hab was in town today. But oh well, I was thinking of going, and not heading to prayer meeting. But then I didn't go in the end, I went for prayer meeting instead. I am so glad I did, if not I would still be stuck in my own little world of sorrows for myself. Pastor was sharing about our circumstances. He said this, " Whenever we are in circumstances, we always compare our behind the scenes to other people's highlight reals/reels?" The example he quoted was, let's say you gave 10,000 for building fund, and the other guy gave 1,000 and he got blessed 10,000 and you are sitting there thinking to yourself, God I gave you so much more but I didn't get back anything. Which results in INSECURITY. We always think that others are better than us. I just felt that message was for me or the answer to my cries. We have to understand we are doing so much better than we think we are. We have to know the purpose of our circumstances. I believe that now, whatever I'm going through, there's a reason for it. I just have to know what's it for and for that I've to seek and pray. Sometimes when we don't see that door out of our circumstance opening, we start to lose hope and be discouraged. If we look to God, instead of the door, we can be set free in our hearts, and soon we will be physically also set free. We have to learn to embrace our circumstances in our life. We go through things in life because there's a reason for it in the end. We have to be contended with what God has given to us right now, and be at peace with ourselves before we can find deliverance. I believe that right now, I really feel blessed, thinking back on my life, through every ups and downs, there's always the blessing that comes after, or the way it shapes my life for the better, or how it gives me the experience of going through that part of life that now I can help others who are going through it. There's always a purpose. Sometimes I know we can really stoop low in our worries and sadness, it happens to me alot, but times like this only God shows me the reason, be refreshes my mind and my heart and builds me up and encourages me to fight. We have to know that we're already halfway through, it's stupid to give up now. We can do so much more if we can persevere! Though sometimes our circumstances can go on for a long period of time, just stay hopeful, sing praises and pray during these times and you will find that it will soon be over. I really found my answer for my troubles now. Though it might still weigh me down physically, but my soul and spirit, will never succumb to it. It will find it's way out. I do hope for those reading this post, that you will find your reason through the storms of your life. Your circumstances are like incubators that will help you become a better person if you allow yourself to learn and know what you have to do (the right thing) that will bring your victory over your circumstance. I really do hope you will be grateful for what you have right now, for family, friends, food. Other's don't even have some of these. I pray that you will be blessed! (:

" True freedom is not found when we are out of our circumstances, but true freedom is found when we are in our circumstances" - Pastor Aries.

Well, to my lady friends out there, please if you're the type that like to put boys on those little waiting list of yours, i'm not saying it's wrong, it's okay but if you're sure that you don't like that person, please tell that poor boy, and don't lead him on and make him suffer if you're just going to tell him no in the end. Even if you think there's a possibility that you guys might be together, at least show him signs to let him know he's not waiting for something he can't get. It really feels like crap honestly, it haunts him night and day, when he's in school/work almost all times of his life. But it's different if you both know that you guys like one another, then waiting wouldn't be a problem at all because at least you both know in the end it's going to be alright. I'm sorry if you don't agree with my views, but these are just my opinions and the way I see it. In the end, life's short, you'll never know when the person might be gone, you'll never know if the person is the right one, and when it's too late do not regret. I believe sometimes some guys are actually very nice at the start, but because of some girls who just make use of them, and then they just can't give a shit about being true to love anymore and then they change, and then they say he's bad, and he's just useless, but to be honest it's not his fault. I've seen enough nice guys turn bad because of girls who just chase drama-like boys that they will never find. If you're one of them, please don't do it. You actually change people and hurt them, while searching for something that isn't true. I'm not going to elaborate between those drama-ish and real life love. It's not about fame, looks nor money, but Faith, Love and Trust.

I don't even know where to start. Life's been really boring during the holidays. Though yes most of the days I'm occupied, but yet I feel like I'm wasting my life away. What have I done that has brought me true happiness. What is true happiness? I haven't found it yet. Though the true and  best happiest times are that of the Lord's miracles and works in my life and just him being there to listen to me.

Holidays are just coming to an end right now, just afrew more days and ill be back to the days where ill travel 1 hour to sch and usually spend the whole day there and then an hour back home , and rest. That's how life's going to be from here on out. Nothing much of a excitement. As i close my eyes, and type these words, I;m just typing whatever comes to my head. Not looking at what you type but only checking when you know you have done a mistake, somehow this helps me to think better, thank to look at this page of all white and blank, the empty space below the words i've already written.

What I decided to do was to at least meet some of the old friends I've had, call them and surprise them, write notes for them on facebook, i really do cherish every one of my friends, especially those who've made me smile and laugh, no matter how small it might seem to them, it means alot to me. Though a certain friendship doesn't seem too smooth sailing anymore, I till know it's there, sometimes you'd wish that those previous times would be the same as now, the way you talk the way you guys encourage each other and just be there for each other everyday if possible. I'll try to do that as much as I can, to make the person feel loved or at least let them know someone cares. But sometimes you try so hard, that you just burn out and it's left to them to make the moves now, so it also goes to show how much the person cares for you. Though I do not like to have it this way, this was how it turned out to be. Those endless talks, end up to only a sentence or 2 in a day. Don't you ever feel sad when you see this happen in your life? People, do not let go of the people you love. Fight and protect.

I've really got to thank God, for all the miracles that he has done in my life during these holidays, a friend that I never thought i'd get back, someone who meant so much to me, who made my day brighter and warm, someone who'd make sure I'm alright each day to the best of her abilities. Somehow someway down the road, everything turned upside down on her side, and well that affected both sides, at somehow I couldn't make it better, and somehow it was silent and we've never talked for months? But something led me to just drop a text to say hi, i didnt expect a reply but I did get one, and it was in a way that made me smile. I'm just glad that she's alright now and things seem better and she seems stronger. So I'm jut glad that God protected her through her storms, and brought her back. I'm not going to let go again. You said you'll never leave and I'll keep you on that words. Thanks for everything you've done for me. I appreciate it! God also has blessed me financially, as my sister helped me to pay for my tickets to SMTOWN, which I said I won't go cause I've got no money, and I prayed for myself to be able to pay, but God does have his ways of having surprises doesn't he. I just thank God for loving me and always being there. If not for him, where would I be. Who would I be.

Had a really bad headache today, one where you really can't turn your head cause it hurts bad, the slightest movement you make causes you to crumble in hurt. It was so bad I couldn't take it, I just wanted to die. Haven't had a headache this bad for like super long. But thank God for my friend, who prayed and confessed that I'll be alright, and I was fine in an hour or so after, and this is the very same friend that I just got back in my life. Thanks so much once again, for your care and concern. Appreciated. Somehow I do feel weak now, cause I still took medicine just incase it acts up again, but at this weakest point, i somehow feel more alert in my head and my fingers are just not tired, but nonetheless, I still need my rest right, it's such a cold and chilly night, great for a sleep, but also it gets you thinking, as you lie down on that bed, feeling the breeze on your body. So I do hope everything turns out fine. Hope for the best.

"Remember, howsoever you are played, or by whom, your soul is in your keeping alone. When you stand before God, you cannot say " I was told by others to do thus" "

Hey peeps! :D Sorry for not posting for so long, but it's really just been really boring hahah! :P Doing nothing much usually just playing my PS3 and stuff.

I recently went to watch STEP UP REVOLUTON! With Joseph, Erica, Hansel and Pengshu! Which was on sunday! :D BUT I DID SMTH STUPID ON SATURDAY!!!! I was rushing to book tickets cause they were filling right, so we wanted watch at 3:10 in the afternoon. I was so in a rush, that i saw 3:10, i go booked, then after that i noticed the thing that said, please note that timing are in 24 hour format, and then i clicked 3:10 cause i didn't click "show all". And there was no way of calling them cause their hotlines are closed. So i went to check the FAQ, and they said that they only allow changed to movie booking, if you go down to the theater that you booked at, 2 hours before the movie... so I took a cab down, at like 1230am, and went to get the booking changed and cabbed back home. hahah! But the movie was just so awesome! When moose appeared, i was like OH M GODDDDDDDDDDDDD! hehehe! I feel like watching it in the theaters one more time eh! :P If you haven't watched it! Please do! :D

Then on monday, Chevron asked me out to have tea break with her, we haven't seen each other for so long. So we went to Strangers Reunion, at Outram. And we didnt know how to go right, so we took a cab, uncle drove us round and round and round, till the price became 12. and then, you know where the place was, like just few mins walk from the mrt. -.- but thank god the uncle just took 5 dollars. So yeah we ordered 2 cuppaccinos, a crumble top cheesecake and a vanilla ice cream and fresh fruit waffle. Pics will be at the bottom! :D Then we went to bugis to shop shop around, she wanted to buy herself a floral blazer, end up buying alot of other stuff and ended up buying one full set. LOL. She said she likes going shopping with me cause i've got good taste in girl's dressing! Really? :P But thanks for that compliment anyways chevyyy! :D
It was a good day ^^

Today(Tuesday) I went out with Jingru and Joselin, meeting jingru after such a long time! :P She's the friend that I met during my queuing up session to buy SNSD tickets, haha then we got to know each other and found out that my cell group member knows her too. So yeah we went out to have dinner at clementi market place, then went to buy gongcha and went up to the top of the clementi housing estate and took a look at the scenary, then went down to the garden area, and played around and talked then andy came to see us before he left for his movie! then we bought bread :P  I went to send them off so we went to Jurong west, sat down opp church there the coffee shop and then ate bread and talked as well, then walked jingru back, then she waited for me take my bus! Thank youu! :P Then yeah had a long trip back home! :D So i came back home and omgomgomg my shirts arrived! So happy! :D Yeap, and now i'm like having a body massage by the OSIM Urelax thing, hahah while doing my blog and hearing All my love is for you by SNSD! :D Good day good day! :D

Thinking back on what has happened the past few days. I know I haven't been posting. I don't know if I will be a regular from here on out. But maybe when time calls for me to write I will.


Past few days has been really hard on me. I don't wanna talk about it at all. But I'm just glad that I didn't do anything stupid to myself. *Like again* I am stronger than this, I know my heart and God knows my heart. I have no need to worry. All things will work out fine.

Thanks to my dearest best friend in the world, I happened to look back into my posts on my blog. I read almost everything I can say, until I decided to start writing a new one. I read everything and I look at how I grew through the years. Every storm and rough seas that I passed, I saw my broken heart once again, the broken pieces of my heart in my blog posts. But I guess, it has all helped me to be who I am today. If it weren't for any of them, I don't know what kind of person I would be right now. I don't know what I would be doing in life now. Everything has a purpose. But right now, I just feel somehow free and relaxed. But that also causes me to be unsecure. I need to be doing something. Wondering if i should work, weekeneds jobs or weekdays, but i wanna spend time with friends as well. I wanna save money to shop as well! OMG! Shop... all the shops like got sales now. RAHH! MUST CONTROL!

Waiting for wednesday to come, my exams will end and i will have my holidays. Have alr made plans for the week and the week after. Early huh(: So yeahhh for now thats all for an update! oh wait ! TODAY IS MY RUNNING MAN CELL GROUP EVENT PART 2! Hope it goes well! Forecast for my team = 2. LOL! Tsk. But nvm i shall do this with all i've got! :D

Thank You, for being there for me when the world turned against me. Really everything I've said, I mean it. You are important, You are special. You are an Angel. Thank God I'm not like who I am last time huh, you'd be running away by now.

A world brought forth, lives brought up.
In this life we always seek,
The one who will bring you to the peak.
Through sadness and sorrow,
We'll walk hand in hand and follow.
To the end of time we strive,
We'll make it through just fine.
-Yoga

The day has finally came and passed. I'm already starting to cry. Argh. First sentence and I can't seem to continue anymore.

But nvm, ill do this. So yeah, today was the day that my bestie Ecclesia, was coming over to my place to spend the last day with me. :( !!!!
Morning woke up to clean my room and cleaned my table and rearranged my stuff, looks cleaner than ever! Then went down to maxwell to buy lao ban but guess what, shop closed -.- And i had to get her lao ban so i cabbed down to old airport road and met her there and we went to buy together, bought for my family and bought for her family as well. Then took another cab back home cause it was just too hot and i can't wait to reach home. Came back home set up her comps and then used them for alil while. then after which we were supposed to watch movie. She shockingly said, let's watch something horror. I'm like WHAT? Hahaha thought you don't want these kinda shows. So yeah apparently she wanted to watch it, so suggested a few and i said P.A, and she watch the trailer and she alr scared, hahaha so cute! Watch trailer alr so scared! So yeah after long searched i actually found SAW, she wanted to watch but i thought i didnt have it. But chanced upon it , SAW 3D. Watched it while eating our lao ban. She was literally screaming in my ear! HAHAHA! Funny like mad! Her reactions are like priceless! But it was fun! After all the scream and smacking I got. HAHA! Then also we took some pictures inbetween and stuff, then we watched IN TIME. AMANDA SEYFRIED! Wooo! :X She didnt watch it before! :o So yupuyup! After watching, we had more picture taking sessions, talking sessions and alot other rubbish! Her bro called her and she was happyyyy! :D hehehe! Then while she was talking i took her phone and helped her reply to her friend, acting like her, and then her friend didnt even notice it was someone else. MEANS I DID A GOOD JOB on acting! :D

So yeap, we had home cooked nasi lemak. While watching running man, part of it though. Then after awhile it was time to send bestie home. Though this seems like a short post on a long day.
It's not what happened that makes the day, is just every second spent that counts. Even if we did nothing, it would have been the best day just because of the company. I wish today never end, and I wish you were here forever. All i'm left with tonight, is just picture and my pillow which smells like you. Don't think I can sleep tonight. I miss you :(
I won't survive monday night, I won't survive tuesday. I've got to get used to you not being around. I'll be thinking about you everyday! I'm just hugging the pillow right now, tearing while I write this post. Never wanted this day to come, but it's here. Monday. I've got to be strong somehow. I'll wait for you, till the next time I see you, I'll count down the days and the months. Never loved someone that much, and had to be away for so long. But I will not be gone! :D I'll be there when you get down from your plane next year with what you asked for! I'll get a nice one! :D Whenever I close my eyes, memories that we spent tgt comes up. Only wish is to feel it for real again. Anw, don't think I can type anymore. I need to calm down. HAHA! So yeah! Thanks for making my day bestie!(: Love ya~

It's been a long week. But I don't remember much of what I did, other than the things I've done with my bestie. I just took like 5-10 mins trying to remember what I did for the whole week. Oh god. Can't remember a single thing. This can't be happening. It's like I had a hangover. Haha! Well then, I'll just talk about wednesday which I remember most clearly. Wanted to watch Total Recall with my bestie! :D So we called Austin and Jiamei along, and they were free! Yay! So at first in the afternoon went to meet bestie and bel at serangoon and we were supposed to go to her ahgong house to drop bel off, but haha bel talked us into going to NEX to buy herself sushi, AND also just because she want to go to the disney store and make bestie buy for her stuff! hehehe! Such a smart girl uh(: Guess what! ahah bestie also bought for herself something HEHEHE! A alien pouch that can keep her polaroid! (: So cute! Bel bought for herself a alien pencil case! So after that we went to buy sushi and we sat and eat and I took a picture with Bel! :D
Bel is such a cutie! Hehe she even wrote me a small letter! So cute right right right! :D Then we set off to farrer park, and I have no idea what's the mall called but yeah we went to yoguru, cause bel wanted to eat it! So we sat and watched her eat while bestie heared the songs i want her to hear while I talked to bel about all kinds of crap. I read the letters that Bestie wrote me, and she read mine. :D then after that we went to take a shuttle bus to ahgong's house and dropped bel off! Don't know if i'll see her again before she leaves :( Then after that we went to take a cab down to plaza sing, and it was so blazing hot and bright! Sunglasses! :D We spammed some pictures in the cab! Got down at plaza sing, went around to buy stuff and then went to find jiamei at macs. Waited for austin, they went to had dinner while me and bestie went to buy gongcha and fruits, and during that time I WAS HACKED ON FACEBOOK BY JIAMEI AND AUSTIN. Which I only found out after the movie because my notification was going boom! The movie was super awesome! :D It keeps you in suspense and makes you stop breathing HAHAH! After the movie, sent bestie home again, we sat downstairs and talked about stuff and took more pictures! Days like this shouldn't end at all!
Talked till late and then my phone was like dying. So I went home! Reached home around 12ish. 3 more days left before all these comes to an end for the year. :( sigh! I don't know what to do once she's gone. Everything's not going to be the same again. I'll just have to live through it and wait till next year. Can't wait for sunday to come though I don't want it to come. Or just stay sunday forever. That would be the best thing ever! Exams around the corner as well, and then comes holidays in sept. But it's not going to be fun at all with bestie not around anymore! Why why why ! :( Oh well! I am still positive we'll spend time together somehow! :D I'm currently in class writing this haha! Cause there's just nothing left to do.

I know I haven't been here for a long time, have been really busy I suppose? :P Or should I say i'm just rather occupied through the night these times.

For the past few weeks, everything just seemed awesome, because bestie was around. I don't really want to go into details, cause I won't stop. HAHAHA! So yeah, school has been rather boring :( ! Cause we've already finish most of our mock papers which teacher gave us. So we're like going to sch for nth. Plus the forklift thing is like the only lesson that is "Fun" HAHAH! Can't wait for my holidays! :D Which are around the corner!

Past few days I haven't been eating much, finally got a good meal with Andy today, call him up cause it seemed so long since we sat down and talked, so I went over to his place and we went to KFC to eat! I can't go run yst and today :( So sad! I'm kinda sick now, having cough and flu. Sigh! But seems like it is getting better! I do hope it gets better by tomorrow because I'm going to watch TOTAL RECALL! With my bestie of course, and Jiamei, and Austin. (:

Can't wait! So yeah, currently just listening to Safe and Sound, and be alright which Jiamei and sent to me, it's niceee! :D So calming and relaxing just like she said! :D  Just waiting for a call from bestie soon! :D

Prepared a letter for bestie and bel ( Cutest little girl everrr! ) Hehe! Will give it to them tomorrow! Bel wants me to buy her popcorn tomorrow! :o hahaha Will upload pics of the past few days soon. and maybe i'll share more of what happens :D Right now, i'm like quite half dead, cause of all the medication I took, sleepy to the max! *dizzy me* AHHA! Will update tomorrow after TOTAL RECALL! :D Cya peeps! :D

Yesterday was EMERGE weekend service, had brunch with 2 of my cgm and my leader at Just Acia ! After which, we went to hall 603 to see the wheelchair captain's ball and such. Waited for Bestie, to come around 3ish, then we went around playing most of the games around 603 and it was so hard to even 5 stickers argh! But after many tries at various booths, I got my emerge badge! So yeah after that it was already around 440, so we went to service, bestie went to sit with her cg so I went to sit with my cg as well, had so many people for emerge! Glad to see that (:



Service was just awesome, teaching us about building our own altars before God.
1. An Altar is a place of SANCITITY.
2. An Altar is a place of SURRENDER.
3. An Altar is a place of SERVICE.
4. An Altar is a place of SHAPING
5. An Altar is a place of SIGHT.

So yeah, somehow during service, I was really burdened, deep down in my heart, I felt alone, I just felt that what I'm doing now, is not enough. I felt the need to take a step away from the world, and just be alone. I felt I wasn't giving this world enough. I kept asking myself, " What can I do? What more is there to me, How can I do more for the Kingdom, as a Connect Group Leader how can I improve my members and help them grow. ?" Aside from all that, I felt a longing, a longing for the touch of God once again, I was mixed with all kinds of emotion. I somehow felt a sense of unbelonging. I felt that I'm the kind of person, who would come, make someone happy, and then leave. I felt unappreciated. Most of my relationships with people have been as such, only being there for that moment of their need and then never again. But then, I also find the beauty in such things. I was troubled with all these feelings till the night ended, I cried out to God for help, to make me stronger and more spiritual and to help me walk in His ways, cause I felt that I almost have lost my sight of a goal. I was walking aimlessly. But then again, this song came up while I was feeling all these.

I have never walked on water
Felt the waves beneath my feet but
At your Word Lord, I'll receive Your
Faith to walk on oceans deep

And I remember how You found me:
In that very same place
All my failing surely would've drowned me
Still You made a way

You are my freedom
Jesus you're the reason
I'm kneeling again at Your throne
Where would I be without You
Here in my life, here in my life?

You have said that all the heavens
Sing for joy at one who finds
The way to freedom, truth of Jesus
Brought from death into His life

And I remember how You saw me:
Through the eyes of Your grace
And though the cost was Your beloved for me
Still you made a way!

GUYS! BATMAN WAS FREAKING AWESOME! Though it was a rather draggy show, for 2 hours 40 mins, excluding the advertisments and such. You really have to go to the toilet before watching the movie, cause you better not miss any part of the movie! It's all important, to me I think it is. I've never gone to the toilet during a movie in my entire life! :o hahaha Never miss a moment! So yeah, batman was just awesome today. PLUS ANNE HATHAWAY WAS THE ACTRESS, OH MY LORD. The movie starting was mostly talking and such, but it's worth it :D hehe! THE ENDING WAS JUST MIND BLOWING. THE TWIST IN THE STORY. WHO EVER KNEW RIGHT. AHAHAH! I bet no one was expecting it. Anw, I did have fun with Bestie, Austin and Haoyi! :D Jm wasn't interested plus she had dance so she couldn't join us. T.T But nonetheless, fun anyway! Got a new polaroid pic with Ecclesia, thank god my hair is much better now. HAHA!  But still not close enough :P So tomorrow again, more more! :X

Monday and Tues, hasn't been any special in any way. Monday, I had my CMS(Communication For Business) role play test. Which I would have to choose out of 5 different types of situation I would be in. So I had to randomly pick one. There were "Customer Service, Customer Complain, Tourism, Job Interview, Student Exchange Programme. (If I'm right). I got the "Customer Complain" Which I think was not that hard.

Just like the title says, on Sunday the 22nd of July, my cell group organized a cell group running man. We were not made known of any of the informations at first, so the only way to get the clues were actually to fellowship with the members of your team, at least 3 have to be present, friends who join that fellowship will be a point each, if you bring your friend for service also one point, and if that friend turns up for the actual day event which is yesterday, extra one point. So all these points will help you earn hints and clues for the actual day.

My team had Me(Leader), Russell, Yaomin, Jeremy & Jerome, and Jiayi. I also had 2 friends over for service, so that gained me extra 2 points. And my team met up once during the week before event. So that earned me 2 points I think, cause i had 4 members present instead of 3. The other team leaders were Wesley, Ladylene and Mag.

So the final day came, Sunday the 22nd of July. We were asked to meet at commonwealth, 2 teams at commonwealth mrt, 2 teams at dover mrt. Then we waiting for the sms, that will mark the start of the event.
At 1 sharp, the message came in, with the first clue, which is to find the mission person around the exits of Buona Vista Mrt, walked around finally found Xiuzhen. Then, we were given another clue which is to find another clue which was under a map. We walked around and didnt find it, but then we noticed the other team found, so we kind of figured where it was. Oh and I forgot to mention, my team only Jiayi showed up for the event. So we were like a 2 man team against 4/5 of the other team. Was disappointed at first, but was filled with more competitiveness due to the lack of members. So yeah, continuing, our venue was at the Hilltop Plaza area, just beside MOE building, WHICH IS A HILL! It was blazing hot like mother nature was having a fever of 39 degrees. We had to keep running up and down that hill like nobody business. So the first clue led us to the top of the Hill, where Jiawei was. He gave us the first mission which was to find a W461 strip of paper around the playground. There were different ones, so had to find the correct ones. Then I TOTALLY FORGOT TO OBSERVE THE SURROUNDING! Felt like such a failed running man fan. :( ! The question was to name the colours of all 3 slides and the roof top! Obviously we failed, so we had another mission, which was to find a paper on a tree, and take a picture with the tree, and this time I GOT IT, I TOOK A PICTURE OF THE NAME OF THE TREE! Phew~ Obviously, the question was what was the name of the tree, and we got it right. Then he issued us the next mission, which was to get water in a plastic cup (given) from the waterwall, and I was like, the waterwall is here, but there is no water. Soon after to only notice the water was inside, deep inside, LOL. We were given only 3 minutes to get the water and go back up, obviously we failed. So the next mission, was to run back down to the entrance, near the roadside, while one of the member stays up, which is Jiayi, and i had to roll a dice 3 times, which then results in 3 different drinks being mixed together, then Jiayi is supposed to come down and guess it, we got it wrong the first time, so we both had to go back ALL THE WAY UP, and Jiayi went down instead, and I guessed, and we got it right this time round.

Another clue was given, which is to find another paper UNDER another tree, which we walked and walked and finally found it at the top and all the way to the back of the hill on a big tree. Then it said to head to the playground, which then we have to do a circuit of the playground stuff, so the other teams had 4/5 so they can do one each, while I only had 2, which we have to do multiple times, first was to spin around this spinning thing, tap Jiayi, which she had to climb the slide and slide down 5 times, and then back to me , I had to climb the ropes to touch the top and back down 5 times, and then shoot an empty can down with a rubber band. Then after which we had to go back to the top, and wait for the rest to finish and to start the finale. The finale was to create a structure that will your egg inside, and withstand attacks from other teams. So to every clue card we had, it was like A,B,C,D. So whichever alphabet you have on which respective colour card will determine what your items are for the structure creating. My team got duck tape, 15 satay sticks and a penknife. Our attacking item was SMALL paper ball, and our defense was TISSUE PAPER (SERIOUSLY). Others had awesome stuff like LARGE PAPER BALL AND A4 PAPER AND HALF A NEWSPAPER. So yeah, I destroyed 2 teams eggs, which then they all CAME TO MINE TO DESTROY IT ! boohoo! Which then resulted in the other team to win. But overall, Wesley came in first, due to their points earned by fellowship and WITH MY 2 MAN GROUP I ACTUALLY CAME IN SECOND, falling by 1 point only, WOOOO! I really think we did a good job! Thanks to Jiayi who came and saved my life from being a one man group. Hahaha!

Let me first say, I love everyone and I don't hold anything against anyone. 

Hey, I'm sorry I didn't write something about you, not that I didn't want to, its just I'm afraid that it you might think I'm crazy. But then, I guess you'll want to hear what I think about you right?(:

In the times of seasons, like i've said, people stay for the season, once it's over they're gone. I don't know if ours is a seasonal friendship or not, but I certainly do not want it to be that way. But I can't do this on my own. As much as I want this to last forever, you'll have to want it to also. Takes 2 hands to clap right?

Honestly, I don't care what's the word that has been going around, cause I can't be bothered. If anyone comes inbetween me and someone of importance to me, I am not going to let go. I'm just going to let it pass me by, like i've never heard anything. I am not going to back away this time. I've always done that, once things go weird, I get myself out to save myself and to not let it go any worse, and that has cost me to lose bonds, but this time I'm not letting you go. I want this to last. I'll spend forever, fixing things up even if it goes bad, cause breaking a bond is so much more easier than creating one. But, with determination and love and care, I believe I can renew bonds and make them stronger. You've always been around, more than anyone else has been. Though I have to admit sometimes it might be a little hard to get some personal stuff across to you, at least you still were there and you listened, and that is all I need, so I do not worry about your replies, I don't mind even if you don't reply, as long I know you listened, I'm happy already. That's how important you are, that just your presence is enough to make me feel at ease, even when everything around seems to be falling apart. When we first talked, I never imagined, we would end up where we are now, never knew you would become someone that meant alot to me, I thought you were just going to be another face and name that would pass me by, but I guess I was wrong, everything about you was just awesome, the first time we actually planned an impromtu meet up ( Can an impromtu meeting be planned, won't that not be a planned meeting ? Just wondering hehe ) and I followed you around to shop at Far East, and how you were looking for so many things, but never end up buying anything at all. Hahahah, after which we went to scape to look for your turquoise OPI, looked for a good 5 mins, but didnt find the one you want, but you got what was the closest to that colour. We also had our wonderful baked rice dinner and milo and headed to actually watch a movie or smth right, but then we headed to NEX instead but didnt watch but slacked around, sitting down at the park nearby your place, and just talked about our lives under the night sky, the last time I did that was just so long ago, hehe and I still remember you were scared of that big Golden Retriever that came up to us :P Hehe! And yeah, it was a good night, and that night and that day was the mark of your importance, cause I knew that this was a bond worth investing my life in.

Thanks for everything up till this day. Thank you for your time, thank you for your company, thank you for your words of comfort, thank you for your random messages, thank you for your morning and good night messages ( Though they are just goodnight and morning ) HAHA! Thank you for always kajiao-ing me, thank you for giving me that message on a tree bark wood thing, thank you for going out with me, thank you for listening to all the rubbish that I have to say, thank you for putting up with my randomness that seems to not make sense at all. Thanks for being my friend. Love ya~

Sunday! The day that I have been waiting for. Today, Bestie, Jiamei, Haoyi, Austin and myself went to watch SpiderMan! The movie was just so awesome. Though this time he looks kinda week, need people help him.Haha! But nonetheless, it was really well directed and well acted especially all the graphics and etc. A THUMBS UP for this movie! Bammm! So as I was walking to the movie theater, saw the opening date for Batman! 19 July! 4 more days OMG! Planning to watch it with them again next week :D Hope they are free! WE WENT TO GARDENS BY THE BAY TODAY! Was rather hot at first, but then we went to get our tickets and we went into the observatories and we were literally going woahh! The Flower Dome, filled with flowers from all over the world, held in a air-conditioned dome. A sight worth going to look at without worrying about the weather! The place is filled with nice fresh air and aroma from the plants. Can just stay there forever :P Went around taking pictures of many different plants! We took around 2 hours to finish walking around the flower dome, and when we ended there was this whole area of roses, just felt like sleeping there! Like a bed of roses. Took a group photo over there, and then we headed of to the Cloud Forest. This is where the "woah" turned into OHMYGOD! Right at the entrance, a big man-made waterfall. Falling like magical water, filled with love and peace. The sight and the feeling of the mist hitting you, just makes you feel like staying there, it was just spectacular. Then we took a lift up to level 6 of that place and we had to walk down going through many places inside of the waterfall. Places such as, the Lost World, The Cavern, Crystal Mountain, Earth Check, +5 Degrees and finally reach the secret garden and then back to the canopy! The whole experience was just made much better of the company that came along with me! Without them, I don't think I would have enjoyed it much. Thank you to the friends who came! It was a fun-filled experience. One that will stay in my heart. As the day came to and end, we went to marina square to have dinner, and by then we were all already dead ! Took some polaroids before we parted ways. I do hope my plan for next week works out! Its so unfair that i've got only 29 days left with my bestie. :( !

It's not long, and why do I have school at this kinda timing, argh. Anw, it was still fun. Pray for a memory filled month with memories that will last a lifetime.

As the week comes to an end, and it's 1:00am of Sunday morning. This week has been..well what can i say, it has been rather plain. Just going to school, from 8am to 5pm everyday. Whats new? I'll tell you what's new. I fell sick, and I got a stupid ulcer on my tongue, why of all places on my tongue, seriously? It hurts to the point that I don't even feel like talking to anyone. I had a test on Friday, on MICROSOFT WORD. It was crazy hard. Using the table to make a house and stuff like. Class was as usual normal, 3 hours of boring lessons in the morning followed by a rather relaxing class after, where i usually sit near a plug, charge my phone and text and laugh to myself to whatever I read if it's funny. My teacher think i'm retarded. Putting school aside, I really do wish that my ulcer would go away, cause it really makes me very irritated. And recently, I have been feeling so sleepy, yes you heard me right, SLEEPY. To those who always know me for  being a robot. Guess my battery life is spoiling. I can still sleep for less hours, but now i tend to want to sleep more. Don't know why, i have been heading to the bed alot of times in the afternoon, which I don't usually do, cause I feel like i'm wasting the day away. So yeah, argh! What's happening to me.

But I just want to be thankful for everything I have, especially my friends. Without friend's we can never survive. The only thing that brings me through the day, is the words of my friends and the company. Reading text messages that just melts you and make you warm inside, even on the coldest of days. Nothing beats the feeling that we get, when we know that across the world, wherever, just a simple text message can work wonders, cause of the friendship or how strong the bonds are. To me, besides family, the next most important thing is my friends. But I treat everyone like my brothers and sisters, but there are 2 in my life that surpass that,  I call them God sent. These 2 are the people who listens to me, encourages me, being the friend that I only can dream of. Yes, you may say, ahh then like that anyone can be your best friend. I'm sorry but that's not quite true. Sometimes yes, they might seem like potential best friends, but sooner or later, they are going to walk out of my life and I know that. These are what I call seasonal friends. And everyone has to agree that 99.9% of the friends are usually seasonal friends, and only that 0.1% is the ones. And I feel like i've already found them. After 19 years of my life. I can finally say that, i can trust these 2 with my whole life and I will sacrifice almost anything to see them smile, see them happy and see them live a good life. One of them i've known for a long time, through the years, he's been the best guy friend anyone can have! I'm lucky to have a friend like that, though maybe he might not think of me the same, but that doesn't matter. It doesn't mean that your best friend, has to be best friend's with you as well.

And the other, I met her not too long ago, on the month of May, it has been only 3 months in total. But then, within these 3 months, we just shared and shared, and found out that our lives are rather similar, and it's easier for me to relate to her, and her to me. She is the type of friend that I know will feel the same way I feel for certain situations, so it's easier to understand each other. Also, always having a hyper retard side, is something I think everyone should have. Though it can be really lame at times, but then we can't always be talking seriously now can we? So yeah, it doesn't take much, to be someone whom I would love with care and compassion, just simply being you, and being there for me. Easy as 1,2,3. I am who I am today, by the grace of God. Also, every friend who have put a little something called love into my heart. Though they might not be in contact with me anymore, I'll always remember them, for the little things that they do, those normal insignificant things such as a phone call, text messages. Those really mean alot to me. Hearing me out, is the best thing anyone can do for me. The best gifts that anyone can give me is, the gift of love. I don't need anything of these world to make me happy, I need those things that this world can never buy. And that is a strong bond. I give a big thanks to every friend in my life, because of you, I am now me. Every close friend you have, there is this " What if i never met them". I'm sure you can name alot of stuff you would never got to know or do. Be thankful for every little insignificant thing that we have. Because I truly believe in the power of a strong relationship ( All kinds. )